Awe-Musements

“On the Rocks” – Holiday Weekend Soundscape

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on December 19, 2009

Chill/Electronic/NuJazz/Contemporary Jazz – 9pm-midnight (EST)

The Saturday before Christmas, we have a weekend full of holiday music and the right soundscape for your holiday gatherings. If you’re staying in and hosting friends or heading out to other holiday gatherings, we have the right soundtrack for the festivities…..

Tonight’s playlist, please do tune in at 9pm eastern to midnight

DJ Style – Santa Claus Is Coming to Town (02:22)

Boney James – River (03:54)

Brian Culbertson – Joy To The World (05:00)

MopMop – Frank & Stein (04:39)

Rippingtons – Tourist In Paradise (05:28)

Madison Park – Winter Wonderland (Vocal Mix) (03:51)

Mark Simon – Since You Have Been Gone (04:41)

Peas – O Holy Night (04:15)

Brian Culbertson – It’s On Tonight (04:56)

JazzJuice – Hotpants Breakdown (04:39)

Shirley Horn – Winter Wonderland (Christian Prommer Remix) (04:29)

The Lushlife Project – Budapest Eskimos (Zoohacker Remix) (04:45)

Dave Koz – Little Drummer Boy (04:23)

Jumpin`Jimmy & the Mistletones – Winter Wonderland (04:16)

Thievery Corporation – Heaven’s Gonna Burn Your Eyes 1 (04:01)

Spirit Level – Star Gazer [Phobos Remix] 1 (03:57)

Gerardo Frisina – For My Mother (06:26)

Lee Ritenour – Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas (03:43)

Mark Farina – Dream Machine (04:56)

Vince Gauraldi trio – Greensleeves – What Child is This (05:20)

The Invisible Session – I’ll Be Your Wings (06:19)

Lorraine Rousseau & Robert Carlton – O Come All Ye Faithful (03:48)

Tranquility Bass – Cantamilia 1 (04:21)

Melody Gardot – Les étoiles (03:13)

Hiroshima – Roomful of Mirrors (03:52)

Greg Adams – Happy Holidays (00:09)

Rick Braun – The Little Drummer Boy (04:02)

Walle Larsson – Silent Night (04:59)

Chelichkani – Omid (Hope) 1 (03:41)

Steve Laury – Passion (05:00)

Tino Izzo – We Three Kings (04:29)

Paul Taylor – Cantina (04:34)

Steve Bauer – Christmas Splitter 01 (00:25)

Norah Jones & Peter Malick – New York City (DJ Strobe Brooklyn Broken Beat Remix) (04:09)

Stockholm Jazzbeat Project – Country Chicks (03:33)

Steve Laury & Ron Satterfield – Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas (05:44)

Craig Chaquico – Streetwise (04:37)

Stephen Scott – I’ll Be Home For Christmas (04:31)

Marion Meadows – Flirt (radio) (03:37)

Digitonal – 93 Years On (07:08)

Norman Brown – The Christmas Song (04:23

Tune in on http://www.smoothjazznow.com

One of the Top Ten Italian items – PANETTONE – it’s that time again!

Posted in FOOD by dnamuse on December 17, 2009

How Italy’s bakers cope with the seasonal demand

Growing up in an Italian household, we knew nothing of fruit cake as the seasonal treat for Christmas. That was what the “mangiacakes” would eat. That heavy, rum soaked, dried candied fruit ladened cake that really didn’t taste like much but well, rum. No for us, it was panettone. The fluffy, dome shaped, dotted with sultanas and candied citrus peel tasty treat. Panettone is THE Italian Christmas cake.

Italians will eat about 40 million of them over the holiday season this year. Seems like this tasty treat is becoming quite the popular item elsewhere too: an estimated 1 million have crossed the Atlantic this fall. The celebrity chef, Delia Smith, recently caused a surge in demand in Britain with a recipe she created for trifle made with panettone. Obviously, this is great news for the big manufacturers of the Milanese speciality.

Some of the cafes in Milan simply squeeze out a few batches of panettoni into their normal Christmas baking schedule. But for industrial producers, they will make 12 million this season – but that’s still not enough.

A company like Bauli, hires lots of seasonal workers to work on dedicated production lines: up to 1,200 of them at peak times, more than its permanent staff of around 800. Production of panettone lasts for four months, starting in September. The arrangement seems to work for Bauli. The two other big Milanese brands – Motta and Alemagna – were bought by Bauli. These were the two big brands that pioneered the manufacture of panettone in the early 1900’s, from Nestle.

The little Christmas cake that could! :-)

A Room of One’s Own

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on December 14, 2009

It’s Monday, grey, a bit rainy. Quite balmy for a December-about-to-be-Christmas day. Went for my walk, the house is quiet. Husband is away for 6 weeks, touring with a jazz singer. So, I am alone with my thoughts, contemplating, reflecting, perhaps needing a bit of inspiration. Sometimes we need the space and solitude to dig into our thoughts and find the inspiration. Takes a certain courage, a persistence to sit in the face of uncertainty, waiting for words to show up on the page. Gosh, takes courage to be creative because not only are you putting yourself out there but waiting for a morsel of inspiration can take days…..who wants to deal with that? Someone who is passionate about their art.

I was honored to be part of a fabulous project – “Meeting in the Ladies Room – Reflections of Women in a Room of Their Own”. The authors Linda Woods and Karen DiNino created this book where they interviewed various women from the celebrated – like Rosie O’Donnel and Jann Arden – to struggling single mom’s. It’s in the ladies room where we create our fantasies or face our realties. The most profound question that was first asked was “what do you see when you look in the mirror?” One could answer this many ways!!

As women, we have so many roles that we sift through, try to adopt, try to eliminate, try to feel comfortable with. Amidst our work-a-day lives, we try to hang on to and listen to that voice within that reminds us of who we truly are. Sometimes it’s great to have a room of one’s own, where we can retreat to. And that space can be anywhere, at anytime.

As Linda and Karen have proved, sometimes it’s the ladies room…..

Check it out, if you have a chance. Definitely worth your while, quite the inspiration!

“On the Rocks” – 9pm-Midnight – EST – tonight’s playlist

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on December 12, 2009

Looking for the right soundscape for this holiday season weekend? “On the Rocks” on smoothjazznow.com airs between 9pm eastern and midnight, showcasing the best in chill, electronic, nu-jazz and contemporary jazz.

Here is tonight’s playlist – tune in tonight to listen!

The Lushlife Project – Budapest Eskimos (Zoohacker Remix) (04:45)

Up Bustle & Out feat Blaze – Silent in the Night (Dub Mix 2) (02:34)

Dave Koz – Emily (04:56)

Lounge Lizards – Pure & Deep (03:20)

DJ Style – Santa Claus Is Coming to Town (02:22)

Norah Jones & Peter Malick – New York City (DJ Strobe Brooklyn Broken Beat Remix) (04:09)

Quasimode – Down In the Village (06:30)

Platonic – God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen (03:53)

Jeff Lorber – Angel In Paris (05:01)

Pink House & Sylvie – Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas (03:42)

George Benson – Nuthin’ But a Party (03:52)

Shawn Lee’s Ping Pong Orchestra – Moodbender (03:55)

David Sanborn – Harlem Nocturne (04:42)

Hird – Getting Closer (06:13)

Peas – Jingle Bells (03:13)

Climatic – Oblivion (05:47)

Stockholm Jazzbeat Project – Country Chicks (03:33)

Keiko Matsui – Bridge Over the Stars (04:02)

Mark Farina – Dream Machine (04:56)

LTJ Experience – Moon Beat (05:04)

DJ Style – Santa Claus Is Coming to Town (02:22)

JazzJuice – Hotpants Breakdown (04:39)

Lemongrass – Body Building (04:16)

Bossa Nostra – Roxanne Nao Ligar (Roxanne) (02:54)

DJ Trax – Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas (05:12)

The Dave Brubeck Quartet – Take Five (05:18)

Q-Point – Flow (04:27)

Shirley Horn – Winter Wonderland (Christian Prommer Remix) (04:29)

Craig Chaquico – Navajo Stars (06:11)

Razoof – Montego Bay (pm Fm Mix) (06:18)

Jeff Kashiwa – Hyde Park (The Ah, Oooh Song) (04:06)

ReJazz – Keep On Movin’ (04:55)

Goldlust – Can’t Let Her Down (04:50)

J.A.C.E. – Angels We Have Heard (04:58)

Eric Marienthal – Walk Through the Fire (05:10)

Josh One feat Cool John Ferguson – We Three Kings (03:52)

Paul Taylor – Burnin’ (03:49)

Morgan, G & Christine – Jingle Bells (03:45)

Kitty and Bill – Cabriolet Tour (05:01)

Santana – Samba Pa Ti (04:23)

Hoping Towards Hope

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on December 11, 2009

I always feel rather contemplative this time of year. As the end of one year becomes evident and the beginning of the next is pulling more into focus, I begin to review the happenings of this past year.

The beginning of 2009 certainly brought us tremendous change. The world was witness to an historic event of the election of Barack Obama as President of the United States. Our neighbors to the south were needing some change – but I think we too, the global village that is, were looking for a change as well. President Obama represented that – for all of us. However, changes have not come easy.

We were in a bit of a mess shall we say? The global economy was experiencing its roller coaster ride. At the beginning of ‘09 we had no idea what we were in for but those that made the choices, that took swift action, did so with hope that we would resolve the problems – if we stayed the course and did what most made sense.

Seems that most took action not simply because of a need to succeed but from a need to do what must be done. And yet in that, the deeper the conviction to do something because it’s the right thing to do, the deeper the connection to hope. Interesting paradox. Feels a bit like chicken and egg – do we have hope, that’s why we move forward, take action and have confidence in those actions or is it taking those actions with deep conviction that activates hope????

I love how Vaclav Havel expresses hope –

Hope – Vacalv Havel

Hope is a state of mind, not of the world….Either we have hope or we don’t; it is a dimension of the soul, and it’s not essentially dependent on some particular observation of the world or estimate of the situation.

Hope is not prognostication. It is an orientation of the spirit, and orientation of the heart; it transcends the world that is immediately experienced, and is anchored somewhere beyond its horizon.

Hope, in this deep and powerful sense, is not the same as joy that things are going well, or willingness to invest in enterprises that are obviously heading for success, but rather an ability to work for something because it is good, not just because it stands a chance to succeed. The more propitious the situation in which we demonstrate hope, the deeper the hope is.

Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out.

Vaclav Havel, writer, dramatist, politician
Last President of Czechoslovakia
First President of the Czech Republic
Cancer Survivor

DON’T WORRY, BE HAPPY

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on December 2, 2009

Been a while since I have posted something, I know. Sometimes life just gets a little bit out of hand with its demands and pressures. Though now that I am moving into creative mode – thinking/working on new ideas for my new record – I find that I am playing scavenger and hunting down morsels of “soul food” to keep the system satisfied.

Here is my list of Top 10 Happiness quotes….

1. “Growth itself contains the germ of happiness.” – Pearl S. Buck

2. “I am a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy.” – J.D. Salinger

3. “If you think sunshine brings you happiness, then you haven’t danced in the rain.” – Unknown

4. “It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis.” – Margaret Bonnano

5. “It isn’t what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about.” – Dale Carnegie

6. “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” – Abraham Lincoln

7. “Nobody can take away your pain, so don’t let anyone take away your happiness.” – Unknown

8. “The art of living does not consist in preserving and clinging to a particular mode of happiness, but in allowing happiness to change its form without being disappointed by the change; happiness, like a child, must be allowed to grow up. ” – Charles L. Morgan

9. “The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet.” – James Oppenheim

10. “The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.” – Allan K. Chalmers

“On the Rocks” – October 3rd playlist – SmoothJazzNow.com

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on October 3, 2009

SmoothJazzNowHey there…It has been a real adventure searching for music and creating a show that incorporates what is happening in chill/nujazz and classic contemporary jazz.

Feeling like I am at the beginning stages of an evolution in contemporary jazz – and that’s exciting!

Tonight’s playlist – please tune in between 6-9pm on
http://www.smoothjazznow.com, click on Listen Live icon to stream the show – FREE!

Sounds from the Ground – Marshmello
Incognito – I’ve Been Waiting
Peter White – Talkin’ Bout Love
Cantoma – Marisi from Cantoma
Najee – Not a Day Goes By
Better Daze – Golden Brown (Scribe Remix)
Gerardo Frisina – Captivation
Suntrust (featuring Jevon Mc Glory) – He Said
Marc Antoine – Madrid
Jazzanova – Coffee Talk (Yukihiro Fukutomi Remix

Philippe Saisse – Monday Afternoon
Robert Manos – Silver from luxury Lounge
Pat Metheny Group – To The End Of The World
Acoustique Parfume – Waiting
Beady Belle – Apron Strings
Masala – Just a Love
Torun Eriksen – Under the rainbow
Andre Ward Feat. Yasha – Andre’s Theme
Skye – What’s Wrong With Me
Acoustic Alchemy – Out of Nowhere

Headed In The Right Direction
Aware – En Busca del Sol
Afterlife – This Earth
Chieli Minucci – The Sun Will Always Shine
Groovematist – Dream Pod.
Dr Damo – St. Germain
Craig Chaquico – Native Tongue
Pretz – Chapel Stile
Brian Hughes – On Moonless Nights
Bugge Wesseltoft & Sidsel Endresen – Try
Alucidnation – Meantime (Loud FM Mix)

Roebeck – Just Wanna Be Loved from
Grant Geissman – Looking Back
Jamiroquai – Dijitaal Vibrations
Nick Colionne – The Big Windy
Boozoo Bajou – Night Over Manaus
Pat Metheny Group – Follow Me

You can find all these great tunes on your favourite digital music providers and of course iTunes!

“On The Rocks” – SmoothJazzNow.com – Sept. 26 playlist

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on September 26, 2009

I am hosting a radio show called “On the Rocks” on SmoothJazzNow.com that currently airs on Saturday nights between 6-9pm (eastern). We’re looking to have more shows during the week but for now, tune in tonight to hear the latest and hippest in chill, nujazz, electronic and contemporary jazz music. Smooth jazz has been needing a bit of a resurrection lately, so hopefully this show will help provide the much needed antidote.

September 26th playlist:

Thievery Corporation – Richest Man in Babylon
Trance Groove –Paris
YonderBoi –Amor
Bliss –Kissing
Aromabar –Little Brother
Cantoma –Cosmopole
Fragile State –Undercurrent
Gary B –Hold On
Groove Armada –Dusk You and Me
Pretz –Chapel Stile

Tosca –Honey
Cinematic Orchestra –All That I Give
Cujo –The Barazilinaire
Royksopp –Sparks
Sounds from the Ground –Marshmello
Bebel Gilberto –Alguem
India.Aire –Heading in the Right Direction
Amanaska –Sleep
Boozoo Bajou –Night Over Manaus

Afterlife Black –Iris
Pushmipulyu –Wake You
Rinocerose –Machine pour les Oreilles
Cybajazz –Cybajaz
DePhazz –No Jive
Anoushka Shankar & Karsh Kale –Slither
Torun Eriksen –Under the Rainbow
Tankerville –Entangled
Chocolate Tannoy –Over the Bridge
Pochill –Violet Theme

NEW YORK STATE OF MIND – PART 1

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on July 15, 2009

“Some folks like to get away, take a holiday from the neighborhood
Hop a flight to miami beach or hollywood.
Im taking a greyhound on the hudson river line-
Im in a new york state of mind.”– Billy Joel

I didn’t know what I was going to do with myself for six weeks. Once I arrived, I felt anxious because the time frame seemed too short and too long, all at once. What was I going to do? What was I not going to do?

My husband and I were given a chance to sublet an apartment on 151West and Riverside. Waaaaay upper west side, kinda Harlem, kinda Washington Heights . More like Dominican Republic – north. On our first cab ride from LaGuardia, north on Broadway to 151W and Riverside, I was transported back to my times in the Dominican, with merengue music lofting in the air and families out on the streets, with their lawn chairs, communing with their neighbors. Our host has been living here for 7 years. She assures us we have nothing to worry about in this neighborhood. But for us sheltered Canadians, the hood can be a bit menacing, the energy a bit intense. Once a few nights pass, we get used to the energy and realise that this is what it is – and it’s alive, full of life, vibrant and just real! With a few mice scurrying around in our apartment, just for fun!

New York, the artist’s Mecca. We reached a ceiling here in Canada. We have done what we could, achieved some notoreity but something just wasn’t giving. We weren’t catching a wave. For whatever reason. I’ve had a manager say to me that you have to be a story in your own country before going elsewhere. Well, I tried, really tried. But it seems like I am turning into one of those artists who can’t get arrested in her own town. Like Sir Nigel Hawthorne who squeezed out a career for years, doubting himself and his chosen profession until his mid 50’s when “Yes Minister” came into his life – and the rest is history as they say. Yup, can’t be a prophet in my own country – so I had to look elsewhere. New York, the artist’s Mecca….and here I am.

We arrived a few days after Michael Jackson had died. One of our walks the first few days took us into Harlem, right to the Apollo theatre. The streets were packed with folks, dancing, singing, signing a condolences wall, selling t-shirts, cd’s, memorbilia. Graceland must have been like this when the other King died. I hadn’t listened to MJ in years. The genius pop melodies were penetrating the air, bringing me right back to my youth and reminding me just how brilliant of a writer he was. Truly, there will never be another entertainer like him. And being here, in these first few emotional days of his passing, was a testament to the profound affect he has had on our generation and generations to come.

But again, back to the Mecca idea. I can’t help but feel motivated and inspired by the huge wave of energy in this city. From theatre to music to poetry to literature, there is just so much of it here, so many people doing it. As a result, so many more opportunities, a bigger playground to play in. And I can’t help but feel that anything is possible. That I could be myself and there would be a place for it instead of someone trying to put me in some kind of box because they need to do that in order to understand what I do. Or at least, if there are boxes to place people in, there are many more to choose from. So, someone isn’t trying to put my square peg into a round hole. There actually is a square hole for me somewhere. Nonetheless, it is hard, very hard. There are just so many more people trying to do the same thing as you. And yet, with that challenge, you feel a sense of possibility. Or at least because of the intensity of the energy in this city, you WANT to do something. You can’t help but feel proactive and want to participate somehow because you can no one is saying you can’t. It’s a level playing field. One established musician may be playing Madison Square Gardens one night and then you’ll see them in Barbes in the Brooklyn, a tiny jazz place.

One thing I need to keep in mind though is that it’s not always greener on the other side. Musicians here are struggling just as much if not more. Gigs pay real crap, I mean real crap unless of course you are playing a high level gig or in the pit orchestra at the theaters. As a result, many musicians get together to just play, do sessions to keep the chops going, to play somewhere and build the community. There is a strong community here, everyone trying to help one another out. And the loyalty factor is high. There may be a few more places to play, and yes the chances of Stevie Wonder walking into Smalls Jazz Club is high but doesn’t mean that gigs are flowing for our neighbors down south. It’s a tough tough go and yet, the music flows.

For an artist, New York has an incredible history. You can’t help but feel the creative history of the city when you walk its streets. How can you not bring to mind that Dorothy Parker, Noel Coward hey, even Madonna were all influenced and created here. Any one who creates for a living has at some point in their lives thought about going to New York. There is a reservoir here, a subconscious flow that permeates if you are tuned into it. On the surface there are millions of people scurrying around like the mice in our apartment. And then on a deeper level, if you’re tuning into that channel, there is an intense flow of creative energy that inspires and motivates. Now, you may need to get out to the Hamptons or something to really hear what that inspriration may be trying to give you because really, it is so hard to hear yourself think amongst the millions of people. But as a friend said to me the other day, there is something spiritual in this madness. And I think she is right. Maybe New York is the ultimate symbol for yin and yang: that on the one side, you have this incredible, intense madness and on the other a depth of spirit that inspires. And isn’t that what Meccas are about?

This is a huge lesson in – flow. A huge lesson in letting go, in surrendering and going with the current. Allowing this incredible wave to take me some place within myself that I never would have dreamed of going to on my own accord. Instead of trying to direct the direction of the current, I need to surrender to its direction and trust the process. Yes, it’s mad at times. And yes, it’s deep at times too. That is what I need to stay focused on and allow it to change me – because inevitably it will, whether I flow or resist. All limiting beliefs need to be cast aside and I need to open myself up to the possibility that all is possible. It will take a lot of hard work but that’s okay. Like that saying goes, something like, who are you to think you are NOT that great? You know that piece by Marion Williamson that everyone thinks Nelson Mandela wrote?!?! Or as another friend of mine said to me, God didn’t want you to hide your light under a bucket.

At the moment, this is New York: dream, imagine, be inspired – and get your hands dirty because it’s just plain hard work. You’ll be tired all the time, you’ll be busted open by the relentless energy that is going to force you to let go of any inhibitions and limiting beliefs. It’ll change you – and your light will be given a chance to shine a little brighter – regardless of the outcome.

Photos of the journey will be posted continuously on my Flickr site: http://www.flickr.com/photos/danielanardi/sets/72157621312739708

TIME IS NO MORE THAN AN IDEA – First year anniversary for Rosie Nardi

Posted in 1 by dnamuse on June 2, 2009

I wrote a song for my mother, called Rosetta. It has the line:“Time is no more than an idea.”

We have our own ideas of what time is. There’s too much time. Not enough time. Too little time. We wait for time. When a loved one passes away, it feels like there is no more time with them.

We think of time as mere hours in a day. It’s more than that. It is what happens within those hours that defines time.

Today marks one year since my mother passed away. Time seems to have contracted and expanded all at once. In one way, it feels like it has been an eternity since she has passed. In another, it feels like just yesterday that I said goodbye to my mother, my best friend.

Where has the time gone? The year has been like a dream. Many times, she seemed to be on some extended vacation. There were many moments when I wanted to tell her something. Talk to her. Check in with her. Share with her. But I couldn’t. And I couldn’t really grasp why her not being here just seemed too incredible to absorb.

Everyday I’d say to my husband, “I can’t believe she is gone. I just can’t.” Days felt like an eternity. Months seemed to grind on slowly, especially when a depression hit me this past winter.

Yet, here we are, one year later. I am scratching my head saying it’s a year already?? How did that happen?!?!?

To paraphrase Kierkegaard: “You live life forward but see it backwards.” In this past year, I have lived backwards, reliving the time I had with my mom. Those 41 years were contracted, squeezed into bite-sized memories. A lifetime reduced to moments. The moments had been real, but now feel dream-like, from another lifetime, from someone else’s life.

Time also expanded as I reviewed my life. I learned much about myself. About her. About our family. About her relationships. My life expanded. New light shone on situations I thought I understood.

My humility expanded. I realized how wrong I had been about some things. For example: I used to become incensed with how much my mother would worry. I found it suffocating at times. She would say to me ‘one day when you have your own child, you’ll understand why I worry so much.’

Now, in my expanded timescape, if I think how I would be with my child… I understand the worry… the deep concern… how a mother is tied to her child. Emotionally, spiritually and physically. Nothing can ever tear that deep bond apart. Not even death.

In my present, I am living a much expanded sense of my Self. Time is going into the future, tied to her in the past. Her brother, my Uncle Sam, passed away early this year. I was no longer mourning for one person, but two. Both carried a past of which I am a part, which I now carry on. My present was doubled. It expanded with all that came before me.

So, I am much more than the 41 years I have lived up until this point. I am much more than the hours on a clock.

Death may complete the cycle life starts. It doesn’t end two people’s connection. Another line in Rosetta: “with every word that’s said, is where we start with no end.”

There is no end. In this dimension, I have no day to day exchange with my mom. It hurts. Going into year two of my physical life without her, I am constantly reminded that she is not here. Not here when I need to tell her exciting news. Not here when I need a mother’s shoulder to cry on. The life of which she was so much a part, is emptier.

And yet… because of the years I lived with her; because of my expanded sense of self that doesn’t include her physically, but emotionally and spiritually; because of this all, she is in everything I do.

She is the air beneath me, the air that carries me, the breath within me. She is everywhere, in every thing, at every moment.

In the past, I had an unknown future with my mom. In the future, I will always have a loving, meaningful past with her. As I walk now with grief, no longer consumed by it, I realize how fortunate I am to have known this woman, and how grateful I am to have known this woman, this woman I was lucky enough to call my mom.

She implanted in me, from living with her all these years, a never-ending unwrapping of a never-ending gift.

In this time, in this dimension, I may not have her with me. She may have exhausted her time on this Earth. But I do have her within me. In more ways than I can ever imagine.

I have so much more time with her in my heart, in my soul, in my being.

The future will reveal all of this to me. In time.